Disney's Hercules and everything wrong with it....

QI HATE THIS MOVIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Everything is wrong about it, there is nothing good to say about about the film as a whole. 

Okay, okay I'll calm down.

I hate it I hate it I hate it!!!!!!

I just, it flies in the face of everything I've come to know and love about mythology and classical civilizations and there are no is maybe one redeeming quality about this film, maybe. We'll get to that in a second.

But first, the bad stuff.




Story:

The plot in this movie is flimsier than a sheet of tissue paper (actually, for those in the know, pattern paper.) It is literally contingent on the planets aligning in such a way that a hole will be opened in the earth, and all the titans will be let out. I don't even know where to begin.

Historical/Mythological Accuracy:

First things first, the Titans were for the most part, gods with human-like features. Second, they were shoved back into the earth by Ouranos very early on in mythology, if we think of the earth as Gaia/Ge and she gave birth to them (yuck). They later fought against the Olympians(Hera, Zeus, Athena etc.) in a ten year war, but not the battle/loss of control we see in the film. Hercules wasn't even a thing when those events happened. Third, Hera was not Hercules' biological mother, and he was never raised on Mount Olympus. As the story goes, Zeus screwed with a mortal woman while in human form, and Hercules was raised as a mortal alongside his twin brother. So the party at the beginning of the movie is completely irrelevant, and the whole thing about Panic and Pain(Hades' sidekicks, who are just Disney manifestations to create what I call sidekick synrome)trying to kill Hercules and making him mortal, doesn't even fit. Yes, in both versions, he strangled snakes in his crib, but in the myth Hera was trying to get rid of him.

We could get into all twelve labours in the myths, but they're really only referenced in the film. The most notable example being the Nemean Lion which translates to Hercules posing for a photo with Scar's skin on his head. But we could get into the reasons for the labours. In the original story, he kills his best friend and does them as a pseudo-christian penitance. He just wants to prove himself as a MAN in the movie. That doesn't count.

The one good thing about this flick:

The art style in that scene on Mount Olympus. You remember that scene where all the gods are hanging out and Hades comes stomping in? Yeah, I give credit to the artists who came up with the caricatures of people like Dionysis and Hades.

Hades is pretty awesome too.